contributed by Terri
In past Lent seasons I have been incredibly unforgiving of myself. I have strictly followed what I have given up. I remember one year giving up chocolate and popping a chocolate timbit into my mouth in the staffroom at work only to spit it out seconds later after realizing what I had done.
Grace is a difficult thing for me to receive and in some areas difficult for me to hand out. Sometimes I wonder if I can truly be a gracious person if I am unable to receive the grace that has been so freely given to me? I have a hard time receiving from others, trusting in others and I at times find it particularly tough to receive help and grace from my heavenly Father. I love my earthly father dearly. However, my relationship with him has sometimes made it problematic for me to trust in what my heavenly Father says He will do.
This Lent season I have been meditating a great deal on trying to receive God’s abundant Grace that is given to me over and over again. This year instead of forcing myself to spit out my sacrifice I have been trying to swallow it. I have used my sacrifice as a time to remember what Christ all so willingly sacrificed for me. He gave it all for me and would have done it had I been the only one on the planet. That is hard for me to swallow. So this Lent instead of following the rules as rigidly as I usually do I have tried to receive and swallow the Grace that God gives so lovingly. With each time I have failed, instead of spitting out the Grace that God has for me I have chosen to swallow it and enjoy its sweet taste.
For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet was without sin. Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need. (Hebrews 4:15-16)